april

now im sure i wont have time to post again tomorrow, but a year ago tomorrow i started my stim meds, which led us to baby Laila. Tomorrow she will be exactly 13 weeks old and it truly is amazing how much change can happen in a year. i know how fortunate i am that we were successful with our first ivf attempt, and i am always thinking of women who have been ttc for long periods of time without success. what i'd like to say is that i hope that pieces of this post speak to women who are ttc, and remind them that so much can change so quickly. at the same time, i'm very aware of how devastating, scary, and assaulting the process can be. i pray for happy endings for every woman ttc, and i hope that each woman trying to get to biological motherhood has the support system she needs. i know im rambling, i just want to instill some hope for those in the process.

Laila is awesome, she's a great baby, we've been sooooo blessed. She's a chunky little monkey with big chubby cheeks and a few rolls on her arms and legs. She is a happy, smiley, talkative baby and she LOVES to lay on her play mat. her baptism is this coming sunday and we're really looking forward to it. we'll be doing most of the food ourselves so we'll be busy busy busy this weekend. I'm excited for more of the extended family to meet her, and im excited to all of my cousins' kids since we only see them a (very) few times a year. i'm hoping that everyone is feeling well that day. lovedove has been fighting off a cold, that sofia just got, but luckily they're both hanging in there. we skipped sofia's playgroup today in an effort to keep her somewhat still and rested, and to not get anyone else sick. my MiL will be receiving some radiation treatment for the next week and a half, so i hope she feels ok on sunday. she's been hanging in there but has been having some more discomfort lately, i'm hoping the radiation helps with the pain management and gives her some relief.

what else... OH. we registered our little baby Sofia for nursery school in the fall. what?! how in the world is she going to be 3 already? my God, time truly flies. she'll be going to school, 3 days a week, 3 hours a day starting the week after she turns 3. im excited for her and i really think she'll do great. i believe that she will enjoy school. i'm a little worried about the first day, with the first drop off, but we've already been talking to her about the fact that mommies can't stay with her at school, and that she'll have to listen to the teacher. im a little worried about me that day too, but i guess it will just be the beginning of 1 on 1 time with Laila, who will be 9 months old by then. crazy. the school she'll be going to is the least expensive school we were able to find in the neighborhood, because i feel like its crazy to pay for schooling in general, because i believe in the public school system* (disclaimer: i grew up in public schools and was in advanced placement classes. i feel this shaped my view and allowed me to have a positive experience with school. i believe in the teachers in the classroom today, but i also acknowledge that some public school programs are better than others. im not sure what my 2014 and forward thoughts of public school will be, but at this point in time i am a big believer in public schools). so we're paying approx $2500 for 9 hours a week september-june. im happy with that and that tuition is do-able for us. schooling can get crazy expensive, like in park slope brooklyn. this season our league is using the gym of a private school. i googled the tuition rates, for pre-k (purely out of curiosity) and saw this ----> $18,395. SHOOT ME. who the hell has that kind of money for their 4 year old to go to school? the rates go up (to almost 36,000 for grade 12 students) as the child gets older. im all for taxing the rich. call me a socialist, im find with that. why the hell does any 4 year old need an $18000 education? give me a break. that is almost the poverty line for a family of 4 (i think that line is around 25,000). my mind was blown. sorry for the crazy school/money tangent.

i need to get better at writing myself a note when i think of topics to write about, bc i feel like this post is just rambly, but i will try to be a more substantial blogger in coming posts.

anyway, following along with everyone's stories as usual and wishing everyone the best.

still waiting for spring over here in ny, hope its springtime by you already!