6 months

life just gets in the way of blogging sometimes, you all know what i mean. life is just moving fast these days and baby laila is growing and changing just as fast. my MiL is still doing well, she battles through bad pain days, and makes the best of her regular days, though they are sadly still filled with discomfort. she's been spending lots of time with us and even came out to one of my softball games last week and i was so happy to have her there. we are heading to our NJ vacation with my parents, my sister and her bf, and lovedove's parents are planning on joining us for a couple of days as well. im hoping that all goes well, fingers crossed.

i think that other contributing factors to my non-blogging have been other people's life events, and my inability to cope with them, even from very distanced standpoints. my heart, love, and suppport go out to lex/aimee who was recently diagnosed with advanced stage cancer. we traveled our roads to pregnancy and became pregnant just a few days apart, i can barely wrap my mind around how different our roads have become just 6 months after our daughters were born. there isnt much i can do for my fellow blogger, but i feel that i can help to spread the outreach efforts to her and her family, and send good energy and prayers. so if anyone is in a position to make a financial contribution, her family has set up a donation page here. she has been strong through many of life's challenges, and i know she'll be strong through this as well. 

the other situation that is not mine that i am thinking about constantly, is the situation of a friend's best friend. she also traveled a long road to pregnancy, but happily gave birth to a healthy baby boy just about 3 months ago. two weeks ago, he stopped eating and went into the hospital to receive fluids to avoid dehydration. since being admitted, his condition has worsened and he has been in the icu for over a week. he is receiving tremendous amounts of medical assistance to get through this and is still not doing that great. the doctors have not been able to provide his mother+father with any concrete answers as to whats going on. there have been some positive points eeg and emg coming back clear, but they are waiting on results of many blood and genetic tests. i have no idea how they are getting through these scary days, my heart is breaking for them with every hour that passes.

i look at laila and i pretty much burst into tears at least once daily with these two moms' stories in my mind. no mom should be subjected to what they are going through, life is just not fair. so, when i have these moments of looking at my life and feeling like im already the luckiest mom in the world, i can barely think of anything that even seems worth blogging about in comparison to these crazy life situations these strong women are getting through. i.just.want.these.situations.to.get.better. ugh i feel like ive been shaking my head more recently than at any past point in my life. 

on a positive note, lovedove turned 30, and we went away for a night. we had a lovely 24 hour trip complete with an amazing meal, great drinks, and a waterfront dining experience. we also had lovely couple time and lovely SLEEP. one of our best friends watched all three of our little ladies at our place (disa included) which helped us to really be able to relax. it was amazing.

a few days later i threw lovedove's 30th in our concrete backyard. i barbecued in the rain for almost 4 hours because we were banking on the weather not actually getting that bad. it was fine, we all drank a bunch and had a great time despite the weather. i drank more than i thought, i was not making my drinks a friend was, but i was ok. i feel a little embarrassed after the fact bc at one point i was the drunk crier at the party, i HATE a drunk crier, but i was crying bc i was trying to make sure that things were going smoothly and i just got overwhelmed, so my tears came from a "good"/selfless-ish place. i put myself to bed before the party was officially over, but only our closest friends were left, and they've seen me in much worse shape.

now its one week of work and then family vacation, and when we get back its just a few weeks until my SiL comes in for a visit. once she's gone the summer is almost over and it is simply amazing every summer how fast the time goes. sofia will be 3 (sept) before we know it, then its halloween, christmas, new years, and then laila turns 1. i hope with every fiber of my being that things are better then, than they are now. i'll just keep praying. life is so crazy.