20w (minus 1 day)

so i've calmed down significantly since last night. once i brought myself to be able to look at the pictures of this beautiful newborn's face, and she is completely adorable/squeezable/wonderful, i was a lot less angry. i needed to really remind myself that though this name, Cora, was what we had pictured for our next daughter,   it really is just a name. our baby will have the same personality, she will look the same, and hopefully she'll be just as healthy as we hope with or without the name Cora. so i want to thank all of you who took the time to remind me of your own personal baby name stories (i remember them well), and i really appreciate the encouragement. for lovedove and i, i think we're letting it go. Sofia seems to like the new name better too, it seems easier for her to say. crossing my fingers that no one else steals the next name we've set our hearts on. (sidenote, if a fellow blogger somehow uses this name before we do, since we're not necessarily connected IRL, ill be sticking to my guns this time) oh, and feel free to love and use the name Cora if it moves you.

this is the last week of my summer schedule at work and part of me is looking fwd going back to the school year schedule and part of me is dreading it. i LOVE being off on mondays and fridays, but i get to keep my fridays off so i really cant complain. debating hitting the beach one more time as its supposed to be 90 on friday.

i am really struggling with some anxiety about the 20w sono on thurs. i want baby to look just perfect, and im trying to tell myself that the few days ive had with difficult blood sugar levels weren't that bad, and that she's fine. im worried about the measurements of everything, everything forming correctly etc. lovedove informed me that im not enjoying my pregnancy enough last night. she's probably right. i'm always worried about the next thing, unless i've just stepped out of the sono room, bc usually at those times im on cloud 9 for about an hour or two. i've been putting her hand on my belly lately to see if she can feel anything, though i am only feeling things here and there, but lovedove thinks she can feel movement when she's laying with me. i think i can too, im just still having a hard time convincing myself that anything felt below my belly button most likely is in fact baby jumping/kicking around.

hoping that everything will go well on thurs. ill be posting after that appt. hope all of you pregos are feeling good. and for all the not yet pregos, im hoping that my rant about my baby name issue wasn't offensive. i remember the days where i would wish that i would have pregnant lady problems, i just got a little selfish and overly venty last night. your turn is coming, your angel(s) is/are on his/her/their way.